great pirce of art,i could cry hearing this .Full emotion and so deep.
Song;Romance De Amour,classical guitarist;Xue Fei Yang.Grr,thts why i want long fingernails.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
It's a typical wednesday night,school was normal, I daydream like I always do.
My classmate starts pointing me i'm a weird,i dnt know why though.I see nothing wrong except for I eager to have an imaginary friend,beacause human cant be trusty.And they starts calling me Kai or sometimes Nisa.It's ackward beacause i always called Icha by my friend.
Got some new transfer student from KL , i can felt wht he felt.He must felt "Wht the heck i'm doing in this ridiculous place?",I know so well,culturalshock problem.Everythings different from a busy city to a quiet village area.
And i'm currently suffering from a friendless condition,as i say i have those couple or triple of friends,but i doubt them because of some identity reasons.
Final coming this November,better prepare myself.
Grrr,they're so pretty eventhough all of them guy.Cross-dressing,i must say.
My classmate starts pointing me i'm a weird,i dnt know why though.I see nothing wrong except for I eager to have an imaginary friend,beacause human cant be trusty.And they starts calling me Kai or sometimes Nisa.It's ackward beacause i always called Icha by my friend.
Got some new transfer student from KL , i can felt wht he felt.He must felt "Wht the heck i'm doing in this ridiculous place?",I know so well,culturalshock problem.Everythings different from a busy city to a quiet village area.
And i'm currently suffering from a friendless condition,as i say i have those couple or triple of friends,but i doubt them because of some identity reasons.
Final coming this November,better prepare myself.
Grrr,they're so pretty eventhough all of them guy.Cross-dressing,i must say.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
i'm being an emo retarded again,Haaih.
Based on the 28th of September,yesterday .
Khairunnisa!Khairunnisa!
She shoted my full IC name while knocking my room door hardly.
I covered myself in blanket ignoring the urgeness,my tears streamed on my cheek vigorously.My teen angst poisoned me,filling myself with anger and deppression.
"I don't want to go up there and pretend,I hope the sea will come and sweep me away from here"
The lyrics of the Blue Sand by Yuna keep filling my air,blank headlefting me shivered with numbness.Trying to be optimistic to fight all the sadness,ager,melancholy that haunts me every single second .
My own fantasy,my own socialization,my own reality has taken away by my parents.Lefting me without anyone to confess except for this epistle of emotion with only ink and a blank white paper.
Khairunnisa!Khairunnisa!
She shoted my full IC name while knocking my room door hardly.
I covered myself in blanket ignoring the urgeness,my tears streamed on my cheek vigorously.My teen angst poisoned me,filling myself with anger and deppression.
"I don't want to go up there and pretend,I hope the sea will come and sweep me away from here"
The lyrics of the Blue Sand by Yuna keep filling my air,blank headlefting me shivered with numbness.Trying to be optimistic to fight all the sadness,ager,melancholy that haunts me every single second .
My own fantasy,my own socialization,my own reality has taken away by my parents.Lefting me without anyone to confess except for this epistle of emotion with only ink and a blank white paper.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
I want to smash that mirror,
That unspoken lies,
The cage that locked me without no compasion
Those feelings i scattered
Those continuosly sigh,
Those eyes like a deep ocean
Those memories that become dusty dust
I want to tore them up into pieces and let the wind vanished them in thin air.
Ah,what am i searching for?
As the goodbye words separate in a junction
As this reality bleed me and left the wound wide open
Life taste like inks.
-6 am in the morning.
That unspoken lies,
The cage that locked me without no compasion
Those feelings i scattered
Those continuosly sigh,
Those eyes like a deep ocean
Those memories that become dusty dust
I want to tore them up into pieces and let the wind vanished them in thin air.
Ah,what am i searching for?
As the goodbye words separate in a junction
As this reality bleed me and left the wound wide open
Life taste like inks.
-6 am in the morning.
arghhhh.
I can't , I can't ,I can't ,I can't,I can'......sleep.Arghhh!
I mumbled,messying my hair again and again,knocking myself on the desk.It's almost 5 am,and i have to wake like 6.30.I'm in deep sht !
I can't stop stalk him,I just can't.I'm arguing with myself for now and and he's feature is stuck in my head.Shit,deep deep sht.
My final is coming soon,and i can't stop my daydreaming,i can't stop indulging myself in fantasies.I can't stop this feeling who wants to break free that run through my body,that run through my head.This feeling of want to break free of this shell pressed me with great adrenaline.
School fcking gaay.
I mumbled,messying my hair again and again,knocking myself on the desk.It's almost 5 am,and i have to wake like 6.30.I'm in deep sht !
I can't stop stalk him,I just can't.I'm arguing with myself for now and and he's feature is stuck in my head.Shit,deep deep sht.
My final is coming soon,and i can't stop my daydreaming,i can't stop indulging myself in fantasies.I can't stop this feeling who wants to break free that run through my body,that run through my head.This feeling of want to break free of this shell pressed me with great adrenaline.
School fcking gaay.
Numb.
I stare at the outside of the window's car,leaving behind a place with many memories.I felt a heavy in my chest as if i'm carrying an enermous rock that force me to carry it with no good reasons.
A numb feeling.The laughter last just for a while,it died away now.Lefting me behind with my helpless lonely condition.
Weird stare,gossips about me,hatred eyes everywhere,annoying teacher,hypocrite human,untouchable homework that has to finish in a night.
It all smashed right through me like a thunder that strikes in a heavy rain.Once again,i have to leave the temporary happiness and back to my own reality.
A numb feeling.The laughter last just for a while,it died away now.Lefting me behind with my helpless lonely condition.
Weird stare,gossips about me,hatred eyes everywhere,annoying teacher,hypocrite human,untouchable homework that has to finish in a night.
It all smashed right through me like a thunder that strikes in a heavy rain.Once again,i have to leave the temporary happiness and back to my own reality.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
What have i done?!!!
"Shoot."
Staring at the monitor with wide eyes,cheeks,ears,lips burned.Mouth wide opened with shockness.Flushed with regrets and embarasement.For once,i felt that internet is over-convenient that it ate me.I didnt have to be so eager ,i dont have to be daring,i dont have to be so stupid chasing after a temporary bishies anime.I dont have to be so obsessed after a creation named Tamaki.
I rolled myself ona green carpet,TV on.Messy-ing my hair,didnt know how to reply this first ever guy in my whole life who kissed me on my hand and knelt me in front of public.Who doesnt feel my kind of feeling especially for a naive,relationship-less,never touched a guy's hand purposely like me.It's not his fault seriously he's just doing his subject,i'm just having trouble with my double shyness towards bishies.
Okay forget about an ant problem like this.
I already said my apologies,nad i hope he didnt mind too much,thank goodness,he's pretty nice.
Banzai~
Staring at the monitor with wide eyes,cheeks,ears,lips burned.Mouth wide opened with shockness.Flushed with regrets and embarasement.For once,i felt that internet is over-convenient that it ate me.I didnt have to be so eager ,i dont have to be daring,i dont have to be so stupid chasing after a temporary bishies anime.I dont have to be so obsessed after a creation named Tamaki.
I rolled myself ona green carpet,TV on.Messy-ing my hair,didnt know how to reply this first ever guy in my whole life who kissed me on my hand and knelt me in front of public.Who doesnt feel my kind of feeling especially for a naive,relationship-less,never touched a guy's hand purposely like me.It's not his fault seriously he's just doing his subject,i'm just having trouble with my double shyness towards bishies.
Okay forget about an ant problem like this.
I already said my apologies,nad i hope he didnt mind too much,thank goodness,he's pretty nice.
Banzai~
Friday, September 25, 2009
white guitar.
Grrreenggg!Grreenggg!
The sound of renovation making next house hurt my ears,i woke up feeling regret because i left my prayers.Checked my Nokia green handphone,and realized that Aida just texted me asking me to go out.
I prepared myself,went to her house with full of her beloved black cats.Pressing the bell button,and she appeared with her fresh looks realizing me came and her voice that i recognized so well.I just missed her.
We went to Sunway,the nearest mall,see people.I met my schoolmate,Sharul;my friend's boyfriend.At first i recognized him and just glance at him.I didnt think that he also recognized me.I doubt if i have to greet him or not.He called me,but he's to far away.And I just walk away.I felt guilty for doing that.I'm sorry,i didnt mean to be arrogant or what,i just dont know to greet you because i thought you didnt recognize me.Aidil,if you read this please tell him i'm damn sorry.
I met my classmate as well.I do greet her,in intention want to know the updates about class.But she ignore me.I felt insulted.I think this is the karma i accept after doing that to Sharul.
I hook some guitar in Guitar Collection.And i found one ,it's figure so handsome X).White and shinee.The cost is RM 148.I only got hundred at that time.Full of damness.It looks a lot like this.
Talk about guitar,he is such an envy to me.Grrrr.
The sound of renovation making next house hurt my ears,i woke up feeling regret because i left my prayers.Checked my Nokia green handphone,and realized that Aida just texted me asking me to go out.
I prepared myself,went to her house with full of her beloved black cats.Pressing the bell button,and she appeared with her fresh looks realizing me came and her voice that i recognized so well.I just missed her.
We went to Sunway,the nearest mall,see people.I met my schoolmate,Sharul;my friend's boyfriend.At first i recognized him and just glance at him.I didnt think that he also recognized me.I doubt if i have to greet him or not.He called me,but he's to far away.And I just walk away.I felt guilty for doing that.I'm sorry,i didnt mean to be arrogant or what,i just dont know to greet you because i thought you didnt recognize me.Aidil,if you read this please tell him i'm damn sorry.
I met my classmate as well.I do greet her,in intention want to know the updates about class.But she ignore me.I felt insulted.I think this is the karma i accept after doing that to Sharul.
I hook some guitar in Guitar Collection.And i found one ,it's figure so handsome X).White and shinee.The cost is RM 148.I only got hundred at that time.Full of damness.It looks a lot like this.
Talk about guitar,he is such an envy to me.Grrrr.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Happy raya.
It is 5 am in the morning,a night before raya.It was dead silence now,i can only hear a tapping of water at the bathroom.Just about 3 hours ago,i can hear clearly the sound of fireworks booming and my cousins chatter in front of tv in this old house that stand over 20 years in a improved area in this place,whereas i borned named Kubang Kerian,Kelantan.
I supposed to post this 2 hours ago,but because of my brother purposely took a peek at the monitor and started to read it out loud in front of my cousin,and they laughed.They must thought that i'm so over-modern to make a blog.Ughh.Typical them.
Today,my parents have a big fight,it was started because of a non-logical reason.Adults cant make any senses sometimes.My father have a really bad mood,i can tell he cant stand my mom's order and speeches.And you dnt know,when he's a real bad mood,his attitude is rather strange.He leave my sister and my mom including me of course in a restaurant without transport.And we waited like half an hour until he came back.Not only that,he drive us to nowhere.At the same time,i desperately need to pee,and i was hell furious.I think my strangeness inherited from him.I can be worst than him,you know,like double worst.But he is still my dad.How much i annoyed by his act.
Case 2,i just cut my hair.And it didnt turned out what i expected.The haircutter is just too rush,fuck.I want my hair back.I look rather childish and fat.And i think my long hair is much artistic than it is now.Arghhh.I just love today.
Oh,i can hear very well the Takbir Raya near my village's mosque whereas beside my arwah grandmother grave's.Hmm,i'm wondering how my late grandmother go through her alam barzakh.This house really reminded me of her presence so much that i cried.Hmmm.
I need to sleep,or else i will be celebrating raya in bed.Happy raya for all the muslims.
I supposed to post this 2 hours ago,but because of my brother purposely took a peek at the monitor and started to read it out loud in front of my cousin,and they laughed.They must thought that i'm so over-modern to make a blog.Ughh.Typical them.
Today,my parents have a big fight,it was started because of a non-logical reason.Adults cant make any senses sometimes.My father have a really bad mood,i can tell he cant stand my mom's order and speeches.And you dnt know,when he's a real bad mood,his attitude is rather strange.He leave my sister and my mom including me of course in a restaurant without transport.And we waited like half an hour until he came back.Not only that,he drive us to nowhere.At the same time,i desperately need to pee,and i was hell furious.I think my strangeness inherited from him.I can be worst than him,you know,like double worst.But he is still my dad.How much i annoyed by his act.
Case 2,i just cut my hair.And it didnt turned out what i expected.The haircutter is just too rush,fuck.I want my hair back.I look rather childish and fat.And i think my long hair is much artistic than it is now.Arghhh.I just love today.
Oh,i can hear very well the Takbir Raya near my village's mosque whereas beside my arwah grandmother grave's.Hmm,i'm wondering how my late grandmother go through her alam barzakh.This house really reminded me of her presence so much that i cried.Hmmm.
I need to sleep,or else i will be celebrating raya in bed.Happy raya for all the muslims.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Envy.
I'm still alive but I'm barely breathingJust praying to a God that I don't believe in
'Cause I got time while she got freedom
'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven
Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man thats gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven
What am I suppose to do when the best part of me was always you and
What am I suppose to say when I'm all choked up and your ok
I'm falling to pieces
I dont deserve this.
I phoned a human,a creature who the voice i can remember well,a scent i can remember well,a face i can remember well named Aida in a cracked voice.Letting my tears streamed on my cheek,vomited my packed emotions.
I told today's story to her.I've had enough with my classmate and teachers that pointing finger at me,that gave a weird stare at me,that whisper something to their peer while looking at me.I'm not blind,i can see very well in those eyes full of hatred to me,a fake expression on their face when they talked to me.
I'm trying to fight all the melancholy i went through everyday,every second.Just accepting God's test over me.I keep reminded myself in my crowded,full mind that i'm not the only one holding this kind of life,there's even more worst than this.
I do have friends just couple or triple,friends?i dnt know why i'm doubting that word towards them,.I keep minding my word,i keep secreting my true self just not to get hate anymore because i just have them to talked to in class.I'm not myself anymore,i'm not the loud and laughing-hard type of girl anymore.My life turned into obstacle.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Taylor Swift have the aura.
I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people and sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm
Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see
'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down
Now I don't know what to be without you around
And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand
And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
Never wanted this, never want to see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve
People are people and sometimes it doesn't work out
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out
And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand
And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me
It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know this ain't easy, easy for me
And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me, oh
I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I love this song,i'm not much of Taylor Swift fan though,but i started to like her.She's different from any other artist.
Btw,sorry for always posting video,i dont really have story to tell anyway.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
ughh,he's just useless.
School's okay.Well,barely okay than have nothing to talked to.One of the girls in 7style,came to me and ask,can we friends?I said i dont mind.She tells all the unsatisfiedness about that ridiculous group.So she started to talk to me,and i said all my usatisfiedness about the class,and she agreed with me.I'm suprised,i thought all of them are kinda hypocrite.
But sometimes she and nabilah is overly overly good personality that sometimes i felt helpless.Huhh--
Well,i dont know about this but,some of the 7style started to respect me more.I dont care anymore wht they do or said,as long as it's not contain me in their subject.I'll just do my thing.
That guy,that i hated or liked .I dont even know. He's just some serious issue,perverted,gigolo btch.I just hate him.I heard from my classmate that he tried to touch a girl and in the end,he got suspended.Ridiculously stupid.But why do i keep that stupid feeling after all,i just have to continue hating him ,nee?
Today,he stared at me again weirdly as if he wanted to do something to me.I wouldnt ever and ever like him.SERIOUSLY,bitch.
later.
But sometimes she and nabilah is overly overly good personality that sometimes i felt helpless.Huhh--
Well,i dont know about this but,some of the 7style started to respect me more.I dont care anymore wht they do or said,as long as it's not contain me in their subject.I'll just do my thing.
That guy,that i hated or liked .I dont even know. He's just some serious issue,perverted,gigolo btch.I just hate him.I heard from my classmate that he tried to touch a girl and in the end,he got suspended.Ridiculously stupid.But why do i keep that stupid feeling after all,i just have to continue hating him ,nee?
Today,he stared at me again weirdly as if he wanted to do something to me.I wouldnt ever and ever like him.SERIOUSLY,bitch.
later.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Yui-It's all too much English translation
The night is turning into a shade of cobalt
The chilly star studded sky is glimmering
There's no need for words of any sort
Rather than trying to uncover the truth concealed behind tears
I'm better off with baseless predictions
Sitting on the bench where the lights have already gone out
And gazing up
It was a shooting star with only idealities surfacing
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
If I were to live life as it is simply
I would gather all the miracles dispersed throughout the universe
And try overcoming them
All because these emotions which are pulsing throughout my body
Are dictating me
This wouldn't do
Am I right?
Being as decisive as cast dice
And not ever having regrets
I hope to move onward to the next destination
The rule book which was created uncertainly
Only timidity appeared later
I continue watching the backs of my rivals
That,
As naked as the moonlight
Was a shooting star which strayed from a pure heart
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
To live life as it is simply
Innocence does not suffice
You can't escape from conflicts too
Those lessons which I have learnt time after time
Are definitely dictating me
What should I do
It's a lie isn't it?
Simply daydreaming
Will not get me anywhere
It also can't make me more pleasant
I wonder why?
... It's all too much
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
In order to live life as it is simply
I want to change even the toughest obstacles facing me into something humorous
And then laugh it off
Because there is no way to resolve it
It is buried within everyday life
That is why I wish to believe
Miracles do exist don't they?
Am I right?
The night is turning into a shade of cobalt
The chilly star studded sky is glimmering
There's no need for words of any sort
Rather than trying to uncover the truth concealed behind tears
I'm better off with baseless predictions
Sitting on the bench where the lights have already gone out
And gazing up
It was a shooting star with only idealities surfacing
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
If I were to live life as it is simply
I would gather all the miracles dispersed throughout the universe
And try overcoming them
All because these emotions which are pulsing throughout my body
Are dictating me
This wouldn't do
Am I right?
Being as decisive as cast dice
And not ever having regrets
I hope to move onward to the next destination
The rule book which was created uncertainly
Only timidity appeared later
I continue watching the backs of my rivals
That,
As naked as the moonlight
Was a shooting star which strayed from a pure heart
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
To live life as it is simply
Innocence does not suffice
You can't escape from conflicts too
Those lessons which I have learnt time after time
Are definitely dictating me
What should I do
It's a lie isn't it?
Simply daydreaming
Will not get me anywhere
It also can't make me more pleasant
I wonder why?
... It's all too much
Nee! Would someone enlighten me
In order to live life as it is simply
I want to change even the toughest obstacles facing me into something humorous
And then laugh it off
Because there is no way to resolve it
It is buried within everyday life
That is why I wish to believe
Miracles do exist don't they?
Am I right?
sociopath.
Amuse,annoyed,agry,stressed.
All inside me.
I was so amused by my classmate,they asked me to bring guitar whatever,And they totally acted they never seen one.I just hate them.
I even hate my teamgroup that handed all the group work to me.
I hate all the curious stare when they seen me,have i impregnant illegal child or wht?I never have a boyfriend in my entire life.
I hate these uncondition feeling over my past crush that i totally hate towards someone that is insanely not my type.
I hate my bunch of homework and folio that molested me with stress.
I hate my overly kind friend that always forbidden me to do wht i want in my life whenever i tell my stories.
I again feel like i want to dissapear in thin air .
All inside me.
I was so amused by my classmate,they asked me to bring guitar whatever,And they totally acted they never seen one.I just hate them.
I even hate my teamgroup that handed all the group work to me.
I hate all the curious stare when they seen me,have i impregnant illegal child or wht?I never have a boyfriend in my entire life.
I hate these uncondition feeling over my past crush that i totally hate towards someone that is insanely not my type.
I hate my bunch of homework and folio that molested me with stress.
I hate my overly kind friend that always forbidden me to do wht i want in my life whenever i tell my stories.
I again feel like i want to dissapear in thin air .
Monday, September 7, 2009
YUI'S new image XD
OMG,YUI CUTTING HER HAIR !!!!!
Nooo!i thought that she will remain her long hair.* weeping*weeping*.Omg,she's so different.This make me want to cut my hair too.But i think i dont,because i love my hair so much.The first time i heard this,i was like okay typical song.But when i heard it twice i began to addicted to it,same for the lyrics.
Anyway,thanks for the stranger that not a stranger to me anymore though,for informing me about her update.Because i just cant watch her mv at all,because some stupid copyright.grrrr.
I will update my day tomorrow,because my mom forced me to sleep for some reason.
Nooo!i thought that she will remain her long hair.* weeping*weeping*.Omg,she's so different.This make me want to cut my hair too.But i think i dont,because i love my hair so much.The first time i heard this,i was like okay typical song.But when i heard it twice i began to addicted to it,same for the lyrics.
Anyway,thanks for the stranger that not a stranger to me anymore though,for informing me about her update.Because i just cant watch her mv at all,because some stupid copyright.grrrr.
I will update my day tomorrow,because my mom forced me to sleep for some reason.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Arguing with the melancholic.
Damn,tomorrow's school.Up until now i cant adjust my sleep time.Insomniatic problems,please go away.
And again i have to face those days,arguing with the melancholic.I dnt wnt to show my typical mood that will upset my mother,she want me to be happy but i cant.I dont even have friends to talk to honestly in school.And i cant focused on my study,i dnt know why,especially science.I ended up sleeping from sleepless night.My typical behaviour,and soon or later i will be crying over my grades if i keep this on.
I keep and keep daydreaming,let myself indulge into those unfaithful fantasy.I keep reading shojou that's involves smut.Eventhough i hate it,it's not what reality should be though.There's no guy would love me as what i am and would sincerely lingered to my skin.Pathetic.The perfect words to describe me.
And again i have to face those days,arguing with the melancholic.I dnt wnt to show my typical mood that will upset my mother,she want me to be happy but i cant.I dont even have friends to talk to honestly in school.And i cant focused on my study,i dnt know why,especially science.I ended up sleeping from sleepless night.My typical behaviour,and soon or later i will be crying over my grades if i keep this on.
I keep and keep daydreaming,let myself indulge into those unfaithful fantasy.I keep reading shojou that's involves smut.Eventhough i hate it,it's not what reality should be though.There's no guy would love me as what i am and would sincerely lingered to my skin.Pathetic.The perfect words to describe me.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
whoosh.
Sorry for not updating for this whole 3 days.
So again like always,i'm in my old house again.I just wasted my day that was actually spent for meeting friends or etc but i went to follow my sister and parents going Carefour and Mid Valley.I
regretted following my sister to her reunion,i thought we will watch some movies,but we didnt.She talked all the way,left me behind,bored and confused.It's not her fault anyway.
I didnt puasa today,period.But i was like one of them who puasa.Because the first thing i do when i woke up,i went to the fridge and there was nothing.I only ate biscuits and mineral water just to fill my stomach,i have to wait them open fast and that time only i can eat proper food.
Tomorrow i will go back and all.Somehow,i felt like trapped .Because all i can see is forest forest and forest.There's a few store,but only a few,i say.People there is soo unopen-minded at all,i'm not mocking them.But my teacher,my history teacher,too much philosophies.He says malay people nowaday immitate American too much;like wearing jeans and all.So what,are you expected us to wear baju kurung 24 hours.Shheesh.Even my mom and father wearing one.It's a universal pants,duhh.
I'm so sorry Aida,knowing that you're so bored at this free Saturday,i would have asked you to meet and spent time with me,but i didnt.
I've got many folios to settle before Raya came.And got this sivik presentation,we have to create our own country,own song,and all that.My teacher free willingly allowed students to brought any kind of music instrument.I dont know if i have to bring my guitar,because you know when i bring it,people there will throw many kinds of thoughts at me with my tudung image and all.And my ustaz said,music is haram in Islam,in many ways,including the instrument that involved using finger.I dont know where he get that from.But i think ,why not?It's not really sinful right?
So i decided not to bring it,they will act like they had never seen guitar before if i bring it.So we just sing the song with the no music like most people do.It's not our own anyway,i've got no inspiration to write about patriotic song.So i choose Here in My Home.
So again like always,i'm in my old house again.I just wasted my day that was actually spent for meeting friends or etc but i went to follow my sister and parents going Carefour and Mid Valley.I
regretted following my sister to her reunion,i thought we will watch some movies,but we didnt.She talked all the way,left me behind,bored and confused.It's not her fault anyway.
I didnt puasa today,period.But i was like one of them who puasa.Because the first thing i do when i woke up,i went to the fridge and there was nothing.I only ate biscuits and mineral water just to fill my stomach,i have to wait them open fast and that time only i can eat proper food.
Tomorrow i will go back and all.Somehow,i felt like trapped .Because all i can see is forest forest and forest.There's a few store,but only a few,i say.People there is soo unopen-minded at all,i'm not mocking them.But my teacher,my history teacher,too much philosophies.He says malay people nowaday immitate American too much;like wearing jeans and all.So what,are you expected us to wear baju kurung 24 hours.Shheesh.Even my mom and father wearing one.It's a universal pants,duhh.
I'm so sorry Aida,knowing that you're so bored at this free Saturday,i would have asked you to meet and spent time with me,but i didnt.
I've got many folios to settle before Raya came.And got this sivik presentation,we have to create our own country,own song,and all that.My teacher free willingly allowed students to brought any kind of music instrument.I dont know if i have to bring my guitar,because you know when i bring it,people there will throw many kinds of thoughts at me with my tudung image and all.And my ustaz said,music is haram in Islam,in many ways,including the instrument that involved using finger.I dont know where he get that from.But i think ,why not?It's not really sinful right?
So i decided not to bring it,they will act like they had never seen guitar before if i bring it.So we just sing the song with the no music like most people do.It's not our own anyway,i've got no inspiration to write about patriotic song.So i choose Here in My Home.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
snapshot of memory, 28.8 .
Maggie Mee as my birthday cake XD,i look ugly,i know shut the hell up.
Shut up.I know i look horibbly ridiculous.I tried to do pout,but in the end i'm like mocking them who did it,pffft.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Bad bad day.
Nabilah didnt came today,so i didnt said a word in class.My misery increases.I guess that's my typical life.Dull.I've been scolded heavily by my parents about my lifeless conditionin the car earlier,i sweep my shreded tears secretly.They even said a word that stung my heart .I felt worse.How will i become happy?When all this time,they dragged me .For once,i felt like i want the ocean to sweep me away far ,far from here or just dissapeared,vanished in thin air.
I looked right,i looked left.Nobody noticed me,i'm like invicible in that class.In front of my desk row is a group of boys.They arent friendly and psycho much as my old classmate.I remember when in my old class,the boy sat in front of me imran and meor always asked correction tape like every 5 minutes.And Mimi who sat next to me who always patience with my sleepy mode.That scene almost make me cry in the middle of the class.I just stare outside the window with my blank watery eyes ,observing the cloud's colour while teacher teaching non stop in front of the class.
I looked right,i looked left.Nobody noticed me,i'm like invicible in that class.In front of my desk row is a group of boys.They arent friendly and psycho much as my old classmate.I remember when in my old class,the boy sat in front of me imran and meor always asked correction tape like every 5 minutes.And Mimi who sat next to me who always patience with my sleepy mode.That scene almost make me cry in the middle of the class.I just stare outside the window with my blank watery eyes ,observing the cloud's colour while teacher teaching non stop in front of the class.
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