LOL.

My life is so inanimate.

I want the adrenaline or the rushness of my heart's pounding.How?

I am bored.

Sometimes ,when i indulged myself into manga,i've become somewhat irrelevant.

Spilting tears over the somewhat realistic ending.And swam in the emotion of the main character.

Hmm,it could be worth living if i had those kind of life.

Darn,i really should kill this unnecessary idiocy of emotion before it develops bigger in it's own little worthless unrealistic fairytail like world.

Even if I’ve been set adrift, I should swim
The incessant voices of people are like waves

I don't actually believe in coincidence,but i'll pray however,despite that i commited sins all over again.

Life is like a recorded tape right now.Clueless,thoughtless.Whenever people get busy planning on their future,i'm still horrified with uncertainty and lost sight of my priorities.

It's like riding on a bicycle with thoughtless destination ,and eventually asked ourselves "How far can i go without turning back?",and thus keep on cycle and cycle and cycle.

But even i dont have hopes,I still have dreams.

Dance,Dance,Dance.

"How's PMR?"

Everytime people asked me about that same ,repeated question.My nerve awaked even it had ended.Freedom?There's no freedom for me,i'm still shivered on what's next.This is only temporary,i don't understand why this words had mentioned by several mouths.

Days passed.The laughter surrounded me,breaking through every bit of particles in the air.It's really pleasant somehow.Too bad kids,it wouldnt stay like this forever.We will move on and go to our own direction and separate in a junction.

I'm spending the thoughtless days,sleeping and hearing music in my tiny bedroom.While dancing all alone in front of the mirror,pretending i'm a performer with lots of crowds.Or watching animes and jdramas ,and laugh my ass off in front of monitor,and heard my younger brother blabbing i'm a lunatic bitch behind .

My purse is dry,and i'm also dry with creative thoughts.So the idea to hang out is even impossible now.Ask parents some money?they paid with me with their lectures instead/sigh.

So maybe i just stay home and stare at the ceiling.

This fun and lively song turns so bitter.

My feeling is down, down,down to the core of the earth.The fact that i don't have that kind of attention or emphasis,solicitude, is bleaching my tears out.Now i can seize it,im no longer important.I can may be selfish holding this thoughts or perhaps immature in regards.I can't help it,

I didnt feel we are actually soul mate .I have to stick in my mind that ,time change us,you meet new people that perhaps was not fragile and boring like me.I must convince myself to act natural with you and kept hiding what i felt.Because that's the thing i used to do all this while.Listening and listening to you without having myself to be expressed, left me with your excuses when i tried to get along with you,and always found out im the only one who initiatived to keep in touch.

Okay,sorry,i could not bother you anymore.you are busy,im so sorry.